Monday, November 9, 2009

Sharing and defending

It's been a long time since I had to experience what I had to go through today. Sydney has a book report due on the 23rd that the report is turning the book into a game board. She's at her dad's house this weekend. They are working on her project today and I got a call from a little girl in tears.

She was calling for me to save her from her situation. She was told by here Dad and step mom to sit at the kitchen table and finish her work. That until she completed her work she couldn't get up and she couldn't go to swimming. It made me cry on the other line. But I needed hide my tears from her so I was strong.

Sydney takes everything so literally. She was crying about never going swimming again, having to use the restroom and wanted to be with me. I had to respond that she will go to swimming eventually but her dad has rules and those are the rules. Next, told her she better ask to use the restroom and they would let her. Then, wanting to come to my house wasn't an option, that she can't run from one house to another because she doesn't like the situation.

So, she did ask to use the restroom and we discussed the project. I went through ways to help her from a distance. Told her that she can do it! That by making a list of what needs to get done and working on the list will help project go smoothly. It's that type of moment that wrenches my heart! It's hard to calm someone down on the other line and a love one is even worst. It was so hard for me not to get her dad on the phone and have a discussion about his choice of discipline but I didn't. One thing we have worked hard to do with Sydney is NOT allow her to play each other. We support each others decisions. And to add to this we do it from a distance. None of this, "Go ask your dad" or "What did your mom say" stuff will work.

Its hard to do but we make it work. Tonight it just hurt my heart that she was in pain and that her rescuer was me but I had to teach her to learn to swim and gave her a life jacket for this situations, metaphorically. ..

No comments: